Yes, I’m a Clinical Psychologist and, yes, I’m encouraging you to be “the asshole” when co-parenting with a borderline or narcissist ex. Shocking, right? Contrary to most other advice? That depends. I’m anti-enabling and anti-apologist when it comes to dealing with borderlines, narcissists and other high-conflict, characterologically disturbed personalities. Part one of this series examines […]
Co-Parenting with a Narcissist: Being “the Asshole,” Part 2
In part one of this series, I explain why co-parenting with a narcissist means being “the asshole.” To clarify, being the asshole doesn’t mean being an arrogant, controlling, unreasonable jerk. Rather, it means being indifferent to the narcissist’s opinions and feelings about you. It means practicing accountability and becoming immune to the borderline’s continued attempts […]
Boundaries Protect You from Narcissists and Borderlines, Part 3: The Very Basics
In Part 1 of this series, I discuss the importance of the law of reciprocity. If a relationship isn’t reciprocal, it will eventually become a source of anger and resentment. Healthy relationships can’t exist on a one-way street paved with double standards. Part 2 explains the joy of saying no. I discuss secondary gains and […]