Everyone loves a winner! Okay sure, but what is winning? You can win the lottery, or other games of chance. But, that’s random dumb luck. To win at sports, chess or competitive quizzes, for example, requires skill, regular practice, strategy and intelligence. Winning friends, admiration and public opinion involves emotional intelligence, personal salesmanship and some […]
That’s Not Normal: Seeking Love and Rationality from People Who Are Capable of Neither
Seeking love, rationality, kindness, compassion, fairness, integrity and maturity from people who don’t possess these qualities is an example of codependency and trauma bonding in action. Desperation and wishful thinking won’t change a thing. Rather, they keep you stuck in enabling your own abuse. Pursuing people who reject you, “rescuing” people who go from self-created […]
That’s Not Normal: Denying Reality Makes You a Perfect Target
You can avoid reality, but you cannot avoid the consequences of avoiding reality (attributed to Ayn Rand). Staying in an unhealthy, dysfunctional, unsatisfying relationship usually means having to deny the reality of the situation. Denying the reality of a partner’s personality and the unlikelihood that it will change. Denying how bad things actually are. Denying […]
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