[Ducking behind the potted fern in my well-stocked panic room.]
To any woman seeing this who reflexively feels defensive and angry, replace “her” with “him” and “you go girl!” drunkies with “duuuuuuuude!!!!” strip club selfies. Uh-huh.
Why are these behaviors red flags? Because they’re middle aged women who:
a) Regularly post drunkies (i.e., drunk selfies). That’s age-appropriate behavior in one’s college years. Past a certain age, all it telegraphs is, “Hi, I’m a hot mess with poor judgment. In fact, my judgment is so bad, I don’t even see that I’m telling the Internet what shallow values and poor judgment I have!”
b) See their children as peers and “best friends.” No 14-year old child needs a 52-year old adult for a best friend. Why does a 52-year old adult need a 14-year old for a best friend? Because they’re incapable of healthy, mutual relationships with their adult peers.
c) Demonstrate a lack of original thought, want to be seen as wiser than they actually are or they’re taking passive aggressive jabs at whomever they’re currently at war. Or, it’s just more attention-seeking sheeple behavior. For example:
- Inspirational meme? Check!
- Photo of my fabulous lunch? Check!
- Selfie of my kids and me in a death grip hug smooshing our heads together? Check!
- Selfie of me in my car? Check!
- Fancy latte pic? Check!
Participate in the Facebook social media [wink emoji] discussion here.
Dr. Tara J. Palmatier, PsyD helps individuals work through their relationship and codependency issues via telephone or Skype. She specializes in helping men and women trying to break free of an abusive relationship, cope with the stress of an abusive relationship or heal from an abusive relationship. She combines practical advice, emotional support and goal-oriented outcomes. Please visit the Schedule a Session page for professional inquiries or send an email to firstname.lastname@example.org.
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